i am 

chewing on myself 

        like

a

        dog who has 

                caught his own

        tail.                oh! 

how i long to

our front pasture

        to join the cattle and the

                sweetgrass and

                                        sway

to

return to the earth 

the sky

to our 

        little house in the canyon 

        to its

                blue oaks and

                bricklebushes and 

                wild blackberries  

but they are 

        gone 

                gone    gone!

the fire

burned down 

                to the 

                        lake

        licking up houses like

they were 

                made of 

        paper

the canyon i held in my palm

it fluttered in my hand like a 

little bird

i put it in my mouth and

together we

burned 

        and burned

                and 

                        burned!